Homes

I was hanging out a few weeks ago with some people I didn't know very well, you know, new people, (I always have to put a disclaimer on these things, lest you think I am writing about you, dear reader) and while we were talking two of them got into an "I walked on the moon" sort of contest (If you don't catch that reference, I implore you to go watch Brian Regan). Among other things. it seemed like the point of the conversation was either to one-up each other, or to be the most critical one in the group.

Now, obviously I am becoming a part of the ridiculous sect who criticizes by writing this post (not to mention my last post) but I would just like to say how awful it is to realize, as you are in a new group of people, that with the way this conversation is going you, the quiet one, are in for at least 5-8 minutes of uninterrupted criticism of any movie/person/entity/corporation/policy/structure/industry. Everyone is SO busy sharing how THEY could fix the problem. How THEIR opinions/ideas are superior and so much more well thought-out than whomever is running apple/breyers ice cream/academic policies. It was practically unbearable. Ridiculous. DON'T WE HAVE BETTER THINGS TO DO THAN TALK ABOUT HOW WE COULD CHANGE THE WORLD IF ONLY SOMEONE WOULD LISTEN TO US. Go, do something about your opinions! Too much artificial flavoring in ice cream, fine. Go write a letter. Boycott. Throw the offending food articles into the bonfire in protest (but let me mourn the loss of some perfectly good ice cream before you do) but don't sit there and PONTIFICATE about all the things that are wrong with whatever situation ticks you off right then, and how that small situation is really just ONE MORE indication of how AMERICA is going down the tubes. Leave it alone. We're fine. I don't care if you don't like the new iTunesX. I don't care if you disagree with the universities dress code. I DON'T CARE if you see the apparent lack of concern about the obesity epidemic by the food industry as how we are all "slaves to the man." That's fine. Hold your opinion. Just don't make me listen to it on the grounds of being polite.

So, that got a little long, but I was thinking that we all know people like this. For whom this kind of conversation is the usual savior faire. People whose conversational skills never reach beyond the open lambasting of topics which afford no opportunity for rebuttal. They only serve to demonstrate how if "WE" (the people speaking) were running said entity, "things would be better."

And it makes me question, who teaches these people that this is acceptable? The answer: their parents, right? It has to be. That's who you learn to make conversation with. That's who you observe making competent conversation with other old people. That's who you learn to speak from, by copying their lead.

It also made me wonder: What can the people who speak to me tell about my parents, or my house, from my behavior?

This is not to say that everyone is a carbon-copy of their upbringing. Occasionally people exist who are just socially impaired through no fault of the home they are raised in. Maybe more than occasionally. I don't worry about it. Or there are those who learn from sources better than their homes how to behave, and don't reflect their home situation.

I just wanted to think about that last question, not really have a soapbox about upbringings. What things do I do that reflect my home, and what don't? Why is it that way? How did I decide what stuff (social skills/acceptable life patterns) to bring with me in my own separate life, and what to leave behind? Was it a conscious decision? What do people think about my upbringing when they meet me? What is the impression that they get?